There is an old phrase I have heard many times in my life, “You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.” I have to remind myself of this on occasion. Sometimes my children do and say stupid things and I really want to crack down on them. Or I read something on social media and I really want to put someone in their place. So before I start to say something or type something, I remind myself…honey…need honey. But I have also realized that the issue is less about what others do or say and more about my heart. Many times I realize I am responding from a place of pride. I want to be right about something, and make sure others know they are wrong. 

Psalm 15 reminds us that a soft answer or honey isn’t simply a strategy, but rather comes from a loving, humble heart. As Jesus says in Luke 6:45, “The good person out of the good treasure of the heart produces good, and the evil person out of evil treasure produces evil, for it is out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth speaks.” 

So maybe, instead of thinking about debate strategy, we instead pray for a more loving heart and we speak to people out of our love for them.